The Irish Times Demo Nov 05. 2020

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RELATIONSHIPS Speak in turn, if necessary using a talking stick (a technique whereby only the person holding the stick may speak). When youre holding the stick and you can only use the word I, you would be amazed how much less you have to say, and how much more productive the conversation is, says Marshall. With some couples still working from home, the stress of the office has piled itself on to domestic worries. What happens when you see your partners work persona up close, and you find it unpardonable? Blair says: I think what might be happening is that we feel jealous of the other person spending time with someone other than us, even if we say were sick of them. Alternatively, says Marshall, you may think: Why can they be so nice at work, but they cant be nice at home? There is also the question of work-life imbalance. In many relationships, one partners job has barely changed, while the others career has been upended. That polarity is huge, says Marshall. It throws up issues about money and other things. The main strategy is to maintain, as best you can, a boundary between work and home, to agree on hours and to mark the transition. What happens when you finish work normally? You go home and that takes time, says Blair. Now there is no commute, I would suggest that, at the end of your own work, each of you take a walk, so you have that time. I am reminded of a possibly untrue anecdote about the surrealist René Magritte, who, it was said, put on a suit and hat at the same time every morning, left his house in Brussels, walked once around the block and then returned home to paint all day. The question you should be asking is: WHAT CAN I DO DIFFERENTLY? because thats the only thing you can control ... Marshalls website has a link to a story about a Japanese man whose wife complained about how little he did around the house while they were both working fulltime while locked down. The man defended himself by producing a list of 21 chores he performed regularly. The wife handed him a spreadsheet showing the 210 that she did. This imbalance is nothing new, but many couples or really, many men have become aware of its extent only during lockdown. And it is, under these circumstances, unsupportable. What is the best way to redress it? Make a list of all the stuff that needs doing, which might take a couple of days, says Blair. Once youve got the list, go through it together and eliminate all the tasks that arent really necessary, because we do too much. She suggests writing each chore that is left on a piece of paper, and take turns drawing the pieces of paper from a hat. The ones you draw are your jobs. You can re-draw every week or every month for a change of pace. The most important thing to bear in mind is that your relationship has already changed. Covid has altered it permanently, possibly for the better. Weve torn away the little fake facade we put in front of the fact that we cant predict the future, says Blair. Because we always make plans. Thats what the cortex is for it has to make plans or it isnt happy. But what we have to know now is that those plans are only tentative. That is very freeing: you will not get too tied to anything anymore, because you know it may change. Marshall agrees. We have to live in the now, he says. Which is easier said than done, but ask yourself: What is going to help today? COV I D CO U P L E S SURVIVAL GUIDE LEAVE HIM ... AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE Make time for yourself, preferably somewhere nobody else wants to be. All-weather swimming is one option. The water is not as cold as you may think. Stay toasty and avoid wobbly costume changes with a Dryrobe. www.surfdock.ie. ù þ 3 KEEP THE CLEANER DONT COOK Remember the commute? That golden hour on the train, reading your book, sipping your latte? That time just before people started asking whats for dinner?. Sometimes we DO need the takeaway and not the fakeaway. You still have a fulltime job! Just because you are working from home you should not dispense with any help you can afford, be it housework or childcare, restrictions permitting. The impact of domestic chaos is worse than being squeezed. Buy cheaper wine! 5 LOOK TO THE FUTURE SEPARATE YOUR VIEWING PROFILES There is no reason to find his Walking Dead next to your Emily in Paris! Audit your digital devices and apps. Run a speed test and make sure you have adequate broadband for work, rest, and play. www.broadbandspeedtest.ie 30 November 2020 THE GLOSS MAGAZINE Who the hell wants to talk about pensions now? You do! As a nation, were not very good at talking about money, with arguments about finances listed as one of the leading causes of divorce. Dont be that divorced ostrich! Use this time to plan. While many financial institutions offer free financial planning services, start by downloading the MABS Househouse Budget Sheet. www.mabs.ie. THE JOY IN SMALL THINGS / MOOD-BOOSTING COLOUR / FESTIVE PREP / PARK BENCH SOCIAL LIFE / LITTLE LUXURIES / DARK FLORALS MAGAZINE NOVEMBER 2020 .ie www.thegloss with THE IRISH TIMES & DEAREST NEAREST THIS IS OUR SOCIAL BUBBLE BROWN THOMAS, GRAFTON STREET, DUBLIN 2 CONTENTS IN THIS ISSUE ALWAYS ON A THURSDAY NEXT ISSUE THE GLOSS will ALWAYS be published with The Irish Times on the first Thursday of every month. DOREEN KILFEATHER THURSDAY THE GLOSS DECEMBER MONTHLY REMINDER 3 SIGN UP to receive a monthly reminder by email when THE GLOSS is out so that yo THE MOST EXTRAORDINARY GIFTS IN THE WORLD AVAILABLE ONLINE brownthomas.com #THEMARVELROOM R E B M E NOV ~ Disguising the CORONAWAIST... the rise of RANGE ANXIETY... whats in your HOSIERY DRAWER? ... outdoor dining at home is HOTTING UP ... T here are strategies to stay positive, even if we cant access our usual options. Practising a technique called temporal distancing where you pict SHOPPING JASON LLOYD EVANS SPOT THE TREND 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 Backstage at Hugo Boss AW20 show. 8 9 MOOD-BOOSTING COLOUR After a summer when the biggest colour story was white and tonal shades of beige and ecru, we are more than ready for winters best trend: colour worn head to toe. Hugo Boss, on : Photo by Michel Gibert, used as a reference only. Special thanks to: Stone Sculpture museum of the Fondation Kubach-Wilmsen. French Art de Vivre Préface. Modular sofa, designed by Studio Roche Bobois. Cascade. Cocktail and end tables, designed by Fabrice Berrux. European manufacture. UNIT D1 - MOODBOARD 1 2 BE TOLERANT WITH OTHERS, AND STRICT WITH YOURSELF. 4 MARCUS AURELIUS VERSACE 3 8 IM NOT BAD. IM JUST DRAWN THAT WAY. DIOR JESSICA RABBIT 7 T H I S M ON T H T H E MOOD I S: 5 UPSIDE-DOWN 6 SUSAN ZELOUF wonders what to wear in a topsy-turvy world A playwright friend decid Elegance is an attitude Kate Winslet Longines DolceVita SHOPPING Pearly white and black resin bracelet, 1,210; www.chanel.com Cobra-print velvet turband, 68; www.emily-jean.com. Red rose jacquard socks, Simone Rocha, 55; www.havanaboutique.ie. Bronze miniature silk roll evening bag, 399; www.aoifelifestyle.com. Sparkling silver Sylvia earrings, Mari Auction Tuesday 8th December 2020 FINE JEWELLERY & WATCHES A Rare Gem-Set Pendant/Brooch, by Fred Paris, Circa 1980 Estimate €7,000 - 9,000 ADAMS Est.1887 PRSA REGISTRATION NO. #001959 Catalogue Online Saturday 14th November On View 4th - 8th December 26 St Stephens Green, Dublin 2 Tel +353 1 JEWELLERY CHANEL Wear it all at once: lots of fine chains or rings are a good way to start with layering; see MoMuses elegant wafer-thin bracelets and slim rings, and Pandoras wishbone rings, in various metals (from 28, below). With necklaces, its all about playing with textures and lengths. Creati JEWELLERY . GIFTWARE . DINING . CHRISTMAS Shop in-store or online now at www.newbridgesilverware.com Dark Romance DOLCE & GABBANA TREND GIORGIO ARMANI The FF flexible floral will see you through this season says PENNY McCORMICK 1 Velvet floral coat, Dries Van Noten, 1,900 at Brown Thomas 2 1. Rose print polo-neck, 425, pleated skirt, 695, Daisy print polo-neck, 425, pleated skirt, 695; al The Ultimate Gift Fabergé-style porcelain candle with 18-carat gold and Swarovski crystal €75 Exclusive to Louise Kennedy in Ireland Available to view and pre-order at www. louisekennedy.com Contact us on 01 662 0056; info@louisekennedy.com We provide a Click & Collect service from our flagship sto FASHION THIS PAGE Gabby wears: Multi-print Rio Verde silk twill swing dress, LA DOUBLE J. Khaki Eva Arizona Essentials sandals, BIRKENSTOCK. Pink cashmere socks, MONAGHANS CASHMERE. David wears: Navy floral shirt, THE KOOPLES. Grey ribbed cotton crew-neck T-shirt, RALPH LAUREN. Navy side-stripe jog THE AWAKENING Who are these little humans? LOCKDOWN 2020: DAY 142 ORGANISED Here we go again ... This time around, your lockdown wardrobe could be bright, fun, and a little bit nutty. Dress up, go wild! Theres not much else to do ... Photographed by OLIVIA GRAHAM Styled by CAROLYN BODNER FASHION THE SPACE INVADERS This is not happening, this is not happening ... LOCKDOWN 2020: DAY 212 Gabby wears: Beige and black check full-skirt wool dress, ROCHAS. Pink multi-coloured print wool sweater, DRIES VAN NOTEN. Multi-coloured print scarf, ZARA. Khaki studded suede sandals, ISABEL MARAN THIS PAGE Gabby wears: Rust Lovers Rock pleated skirt, WALES BONNE. Blue and cream stripe sweater, Wales Bonner. David wears: Blue check wool trousers, THOM BROWN. Navy print T-shirt, DRIES VAN NOTEN. Navy cardigan with red stripe trim, KENZO. THE WORK/HOME BALANCE Whoa, whoa. It cant be my turn a FASHION THE ARTISTIC DIFFERENCES Blue and pink, blue and pink. Why is it always blue and pink? LOCKDOWN 2020: DAY 235 ABOVE: Gabby wears: Yellow cotton hoodie; floral cotton jumpsuit; both MOTHER. David wears: Stripe wool sweater, MARNI. Pink stripe button-down shirt, BARENA. Blue tartan wool tro THE EPIPHANY So this is where the Laundry Fairies live? LOCKDOWN 2020: DAY 242 THE GLOSS MAGAZINE November 2020 25 FASHION Gabby wears: Pink wool sweater with hearts, RIXO. Brown camo-print trousers, ALC. Black leather boots with painted floral motif, FRYE. David wears: Orange cotton hoodie, YEZZY. Green and navy print trousers,VERSACE. Khaki camo-print sneakers, VALENTINO. 26 November 2020 THE GLOSS MAGAZINE THE OLD NORMAL Ahhh, pizza. LOCKDOWN 2020: EVENING 248 Gabby wears: Multi-coloured ribbed knit skirt, ISSEY MIYAKE. Black and white stripe knit sweater, ANTHONY THOMAS MELILLO. David wears: Blue check brushedcotton robe, GUCCI. Navy check cotton pyjamas, SUPERDRY. Red cotton-mix socks, FALKE. Make RELATIONSHIPS OLIVIA GRAHAM T All Cooped Lockdown and working from home can put stress on relationships, but the new normal could provide opportunities for positive changes, according to TIM DOWLING 28 November 2020 THE GLOSS MAGAZINE UP he coronavirus crisis has presented couples with an un VENEZUELA MULLINGAR, SKERRIES AND ARDEE Stockists of Annette Gortz Transit Tandem Clemente Eva Kayan Ania Schierholt Marco Moreo Andia Fora Patrizia Bonfanti Browse collections on Instagram and Facebook @venezeula_boutique Call any of our boutiques with your queries, or for styling advice Purchase RELATIONSHIPS Speak in turn, if necessary using a talking stick (a technique whereby only the person holding the stick may speak). When youre holding the stick and you can only use the word I, you would be amazed how much less you have to say, and how much more productive the conversation is, says M BEAUTY ADVERTORIAL 20 YEARS OF CRE ATIVE F REEDO M Éditions de Parfums Frédéric Malle celebrates 20 years with a new book and seven limited-edition collectors bottles of the most iconic perfumes ... he Éditions de Parfums Frédéric Malle are a world apart. And if youve ever smelt Portrait of a L STRAP WWW.LANSDOWNEPLACE.IE SOCIAL LIFE When will Amy Huberman swap slippers for heels again? Watch Finding Joy on Amazon Prime Video. Not A Laughing Matter... Of course its not. But as we try to maintain some semblance of a social life, a sense of humour has never been more important, as Amy Huberman points out. Otherwise y ADVERTORIAL Stirring The Pudding MAKING A WISH At Avoca, Christmas is all about the food. From baking with your little ones to ordering your festive fare, no feast is complete without all the trimmings. The Christmas Day SWIM We are finding daily pleasures in life that keep us af loat. The tradi SOCIAL LIFE S ome time ago, during the extreme bit of lockdown, I went online and made quite a frivolous purchase. I bought myself a thing called a Weighted Blanket. I wasnt sure afterwards if I had done the right thing. Maybe I was the unwitting victim of a clever internet marketing campaign? Or ESSAY THE REMEMBERING ROPE POLLY DEVLINs remembrance of people and times past is triggered by her collection of treasured antiques and the backstories of their acquisition 38 November 2020 THE GLOSS MAGAZINE For new readers and seasoned ones ... This is the fifth episode in the loose concoctio GOODBYE SCALES. HELLO NIKOLATESLA LIBRA. WEIGH COOK EXTRACT NIKOLATESLA LIBRA. THE HOB WITH INTEGRATED EXTRACTION AND WEIGHING SCALES. NikolaTesla Libra is the innovative hob with integrated extraction able to weigh your ingredients directly in the pot, at any temperature level. A visionary prod ESSAY On the very day I brought the model home into the hall of the real thing, my husband told me he wanted to SELL THE HOUSE. house with its patchwork walls and mullioned windows with stone lintels like huge eyebrows over every one, its stone slate roofs and all-round crazy Elizabethan Jacobean a &%%* .* 4 %*##%* ) % . () (! .* %**(# *$ /% % *$ () 1 () (! #*$* %&#&) 1 32 5 YEAR WARRANTY ON PARTS & LABOUR 4 +*&$*##/ **) * #+%(/ . * % 0 &(% *& ( */' 0 )#*) * )* .) % /#1 *) %*+*- * %&#&/ * * +(%*) * )* '(&($% ) .## ) *$, %(/ % .*( &'*$)*&%1 % &+* $&( * HOME LAYERING ... WEARING ... At last its cold enough to wear layers of warm woollens and chunky jumpers. The Khaite Katie Holmes cardi is only attainable for, well, Katie Holmes, but we definitely aspire to a Ros Duke gossamer-light cashmere cardigan, or Pearl Reddingtons slow sustainable cardiga DESIGN INTERIORS BESPOKE FURNITURE Creators of luxury homes Head Office/ Ballycoolin Showroom Units 12/13, Block 8 Blanchardstown Corporate Park Ballycoolin, Dublin 15 01 820 8480 +353 1 820 8480 Deansgrange Showroom Unit F, Deansgrange Business Park Kill Lane Blackrock, Co. Dublin 01 207 0702 HOME PLANTING ... Drinking ... Hot Chocolate. Tulips. I love this time of the year for dreaming up new colour schemes for the garden, says landscape designer Leonie Cornelius. I love containers exploding with jewel-coloured tulips and small windowsill pots filled with bluebells and Iris. Im layerin WARDROBE JIL SANDER ABOUT TIME CARTIER Three classics get an update I wear my silver pieces every day. They go with everything and are easy to mix with other jewellery. Silver Streak ITS AN UGGS GAME Its official: Uggs are back! Collaborations with London Fashion Weeks favourite designer Molly Ania Schierholt Annette Gortz Fabiana Filippi Hugo Boss HIGH Herno Maxmara Leisure Peserico Max et Moi Paule Ka Mos Mosh Transit Eva Kayan Herzens Angelegenheit Oakwood Gustav Hale Bob iBlues Luisa Cerano 2 Mount Prospect House, Clontarf Road, Clontarf, Co Dublin, D03 HH76 www.ellenb #MINDOURSELVES Its time to talk about menopause in the workplace, says EMILY HOURICAN, who spoke to women about the impact of their symptoms on their working life HOT TOPIC, LARGELY I IGNORED magine the scenario, says Loretta Dignam: Im a 50-year-old senior corporate professional making a pres #MINDOURSELVES women in menopause complain of in relation to their working lives, Dr Deirdre Forde, medical director of Ceile Medical and member of the British Menopause Society, says without a doubt its anxiety. Women feel that perhaps they are not able to work anymore. They feel overwhelmed and in BEAUTY GLOSSARY Winter BEAUTY Simple is best for your skin at night, finds Sarah Halliwell Soft taupe and beige shades for lips: Lancôme LAbsolu Rouge Intimatte, 32, from November 25 at counters nationwide. A light veil of gold for the nails: Chanel Le Vernis Chaine dOr, 25, limited edition, from SUPP ORT ADVERTORIAL YOUR SKIN I n our midlife, were more at ease in our own skin, and our life experiences show on our faces. And we want our skincare to support our skin, so that it feels as supple and resilient as it possibly can. Its been a challenging year, and stress has an impact on our s BEAUTY My goal at the beginning, more than anything, was to prove that great perfumery could be MODERN. It was always this idea of creating something new. t r o f m Co & JOY What makes Frédéric Malle perfumes special? In an exclusive interview, the perfume publisher talks scent, seduction and bê ADVERTORIAL Just as we change our skincare to suit CHANGING SKIN NEEDS, we should be doing the same for our hair. Pantene Hair Biology is a science-led regime that works like skincare for your scalp. Cleanse & Reconstruct THE ISSUES: Your hair is healthy but gets damaged and dry due to heat styling BOOKS THREE INSPIRING NEW TITLES A Little Happier, Notes for Reassurance, Derren Brown, Bantam Press, £8.99. No Time Like The Future, An Optimist Considers Mortality, Michael J Fox, £16, published by Headline on November 17. Be More Snoopy, Find Your Happy Dance, Nat Gertler, Dorling Kindersley, £6 SISTER ACT Author JESSICA FELLOWES explains her obsession with the six socialites who inspired her new novel S ix aristocratic sisters, each of whom come of age between the wars and grows up to become: a novelist; a dairy farmer; a fascist; a Nazi; a Communist; a duchess. Therein lies the root of ADVERTORIAL FOOD TO ORDER Social Insecurities The daily anxieties of modern life Hosting friends and family at home? Make it a gourmet affair with help from The Butlers Pantry. From chef-made dishes to seasonal hampers and festive food gifts, we deliver straight to your door JACKY SHERIDAN THE TR ISH DES EI FOO NO POMP ... E D Y N B FOOD JUST CIRCUMSTANCES This may be the oddest Christmas ever, but for once, we have time to enjoy the preparations. TRISH DESEINE is pleased at the prospect W ith our crazy world hurtling towards 2021, I thank the Lord and good St Nick that Christ IN Y M A RY EB D O W W WINE EY RICH PICKINGS MARY DOWEY on trends, tips and three top wines to try at home E arly last year I wrote about the JURA in north-east France which has moved from obscurity to diva dazzle in less than a decade. Is it about to be overshadowed by another region close A WONDERFUL WINTER AT BUTLERS N AVIGLI, MIL A N THIS WONDERFUL LITTLE PLACE Handbag designer Julie Peelo always returns to this special neighbourhood in Milan A fter graduating in fashion textiles from NCAD and working for a time for John Rocha, I moved to Italy in 2003 to get a job at a fashio THIS GLOSSY LIFE The White Companys amazing faux trees start at 259 for a six-foot tree; a pre-lit six-footer is 359. This Christmas, the wicker tree skirt is all the rage; the White Company tree skirt is 59. WR EATHS & DECOR ATION S Its Beginning to Look A Lot Like... If its going to be a quiet THIS GLOSSY LIFE Inspo: The Dalloway Terrace at the Bloomsbury, a Doyle Hotel in London. WR ITIN G CA R DS One positive of the pandemic is the likelihood there will be fewer smug round-robin Christmas letters to digest this year. Weve all been in the same boat (and outfit) for most of the year. Not THIS GLOSSY LIFE TUR KEY R OASTI N G ON A N OPEN . . . B A R B ECU E Lots of us are going to be roasting the bird on the Weber kettle, Big Green Egg or barrel smoker this year, for a bit of fun. Get your timings right by practising on a few Sunday roasts in the run-up to Christmas. The most importa THIS GLOSSY LIFE T H E M I C R O C H R I ST MAS Table for two? With only yourselves to please, this could be the nicest Christmas ever ... A long lie-in, your choice of movie, a bottle of bubbly ... Order the Ultimate Christmas Dinner for Two at The Butlers Pantry (79) before December 13, and enjoy INTERIORS INTERIORS NATURAL ROMANCE My World at HOME the details ABOVE Jungle Surprise, Expect the Unexpected by Sophie Shrestha. She is inspired by time in Nepal and the Irish countryside, and explores the role nature plays in our wellbeing. Follow her @sophie_shrestha. BARRY MC CALL NAME: Fas Find inspiration for your home or building project For expert appliance advice make an appointment with Geraldine today. Call (01) 268 6996 or email geraldine.odonoghue@in-house.ie Showroom Open Monday to Saturday In-House Appliance Centre located inside The Panelling Centre Unit 14, Deansgrange Bus Double Serum boosts the efficacy of your anti-ageing skin care. OVER 88% OF WOMEN AGREED!1 Vitality Multi-active visibly smoothes fine lines and boosts your skins radiance. Firmness Extra-Firming visibly reactivates the source of your skins firmness. Density Super Restorative visibly repleni